Hiding and fighting those feelings/emotions!

From the song 'Can't Fight This Feeling' by Reo Speedwagon:

I can't fight this feeling any longer,
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow,
What started out as friendship has grown stronger,
I only wish I had the strength to let it show.

I tell myself that I can't hold out forever,
I said there is no reason for my fear,
'Cause I feel so secure when we're together,
You give my life direction, You make everything so clear.

And even as I wander
I'm keeping you in sight,
You're a candle in the window
On a cold, dark winter's night,
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might.

And I can't fight this feeling anymore,
I've forgotten what I started fighting for,
It's time to bring this ship into the shore,
And throw away the oars, forever.

'Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore,
I've forgotten what I started fighting for,
And if I have to crawl upon the floor,
Come crushing through your door,
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpOULjyy-n8

"Emotional intelligence is important, but the unbridled enthusiasm has obscured a dark side. New evidence shows that when people hone their emotional skills, they become better at manipulating others. When you’re good at controlling your own emotions, you can disguise your true feelings. When you know what others are feeling, you can tug at their heartstrings and motivate them to act against their own best interests.
According to these experts, emotional intelligence helps people disguise one set of emotions while expressing another for personal gain."
- Adam Grant, The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence
http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/01/the-dark-side-of-emotional-intelligence/282720/

Did you know that the way we manage our emotions is stable over time?
According to the following article,  "Our ability to identify and manage our own and others’ emotions is fairly stable over time, influenced by our early childhood experiences and even genetics."
But, we can improve our emotional intelligence through coaching programs.

Can You Really Improve Your Emotional Intelligence?
by Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic
http://blogs.hbr.org/2013/05/can-you-really-improve-your-em/

EXTRA:
What triggers an emotional response for you that can derail your success?
Find your emotional triggers here:
http://outsmartyourbrain.com/find-your-emotional-triggers-on-this-list/

"75% of careers are derailed for reasons related to emotional competencies, including inability to handle interpersonal problems; unsatisfactory team leadership during times of difficulty or conflict; or inability to adapt to change or elicit trust."
- The Center for Creative Leadership

"As much as 80% of adult 'success' comes from EQ."
- Daniel Goleman

"We now understand that higher-level thinking is more likely to occur in the brain of a student who is emotionally secure than in the brain of a student who is scared, upset, anxious, or stressed."
- Mawhinney and Sagan

"All learning has an emotional base."
- Plato

"People in good moods are better at inductive reasoning and creative problem solving."
- Salovey, Mayer, Goldman, Turvey, and Palfai

#MainMessageForToday
Research shows that people who are more emotionally intelligent are more successful. Learning is also easier when the student is emotionally secure. But like everything else, there is a bad side to emotional intelligence. People who can control their emotions well can easily disguise their feelings and/or manipulate others.

Would you react this way?

From the song 'Please Don't Leave Me' by Pink:

I don't know if I can yell any louder,
How many times have I kicked you out of here
Or said something insulting?
I can be so mean when I wanna be,
I am capable of really anything,
I can cut you into pieces,
When my heart is broken.
...
How did I become so obnoxious?
What is it with you that makes me act like this?
I've never been this nasty.
Can't you tell that this is all just a contest?
The one that wins will be the one that hits the hardest.
But baby I don't mean it,
I mean it, I promise.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eocCPDxKq1o

Sometimes, the reactions of others can cause us to have negative thoughts and react in a certain way....

How would you react if you think you are right, but everyone (a crowd) believed you were wrong?
Clip from the movie 'Gladiator' showing the roar of a crowd:
https://youtu.be/X1UmHfWCw-4

Thinking/thoughts clearly led to Catniss' reaction in this clip from the movie 'The Hunger Games':
https://youtu.be/5XmzSjqIPHs

"We cannot tell what may happen to us in the strange medley of life. But we can decide what happens in us —how we can take it, what we do with it —and that is what really counts in the end."
— Joseph Fort Newton

"Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions."
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia

"It is the mind’s job to protect and take care of you, to solve your problems and make sure you’re safe. So, if you feel a surge of emotional upset, it moves into action, trying to help, looking for the source of the upset—for the problems—and generating solutions."
- Unknown

"We define emotional intelligence as the subset of social intelligence that involves the ability to monitor one’s own and others’ feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one’s thinking and actions."
- Salovey and Mayer

"The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind." 
- William James

"There is no separation of mind and emotions; emotions, thinking, and learning are all linked."
— Eric Jensen

"There are emotions which are biologically oriented and then there are complex emotions which are saturated with thoughts and cognition."
- Jack Mayer